There are so many different types of families. All having their own uniqueness and quirks that make their family work. Keeping in mind the diversity of the families I am not saying or implying that all families will be the same. Because there are so many kinds of families. There are single parent families, traditional families, extended families, etc. And these families all have dynamics they incorperate into their families to make them work. And each individuale in a family plays a role or roles, that help there families flow.
I know in my family my aunt is the rock that holds everyone together, or tries too. I have played many roles myself, I am an awesome aunt, an annoying little sister, an annoying older sister too. I play mediator between some family members and I am the listener. I am also my aunt’s rock when she needs one. My mom is like a wild child… Love her wandering spirit. My brother’s…. Oh my brother’s, they can be trouble makers. Or disrupters. We have gotten used to the roles we play, and that is how our family functions. And we are an extended family dynamic. With step siblings, cousins sometimes my brother’s girlfriends. But our family knows how to function this way. Even if sometimes it feels very disfunctional.
What is a role you play in your family? How is your dynamics? I know that every family is very different from one another and that is what makes families fascinating.
What about family rules? I know in my family my aunt hates when people smack their lips while eating. So we make it a habit to not do that. It’s also a rule to not talk about family problems outside if the family. When I was growing up there was rules like when my dad whistled we better get home in like ten minutes or we would be in trouble. another one is doing chores before going to a friends. These are only a few family rules that my family has. Does your family have similar rules? Is there any weird family rules that you guys have?
Families are a homeostatic mechanism. They try to maintain balance. And each person adds to that balance. I know when a new member of the family is born it can change the balance of the family and the family dynamics. This holds true when a member is lost as well. When my nephew died… It took a long time to find a balance again. He was my music buddy. And he was so full of light and laughter. Our family took it really hard with his absence and we had to find a way to interact with one another again without walking on egg shells. My nephew is actually one of the reasons I am in college. Have you noticed a balance or shift in balance in your own families?
Another interesting thing I have learned about is open families. These are families that bring everyone in. They share their culture they are super friendly and they treat close friends as family and will even call them brother, sister, aunt, uncle, etc. I have a friend who’s family is like this. And it warms my heart. Have you noticed any open families around you. I know that most Americans are not like this, but my mexican or hispanic families are. I think it has a lot to do with culture. What do you guys think?
Okay one more thing guys. What about theories? We learned a few theories in this class. One being exchange theory. Exchange theory is a give and take relationship. I notice this a lot when parents are teaching their children. Like when my nephew learned to potty train. My sister got toys and candy and other iteams that my nephew likes. If he was able to go to the bathroom in the potty he would get a reward. If he didn’t go to the potty in the bathroom he didn’t get a reward. Instead he would be told why he didn’t get the reward. You stay invested when you get more than you give. So you guys have any examples of this in families?
Another theory is system theory. This is assumptions that the whole is more than it’s parts. The family functions with all the parts together but doesn’t function as well when family is missing. It also suggests that we change depending on the people we are around. And I think that this is true. I act differently with my friends than I do my parents. Or even with extended family. We sorta play who we want to be. Or show people different sides of ourselves depending on who we are with. Have you also noticed this? I am really bad when it comes to hanging out with my best friends. I have no filter it seems like.
There is also a conflict theory in families. This is when parents decide the best course of action for their children like what schools to go to. You can have conflicts with dating too. and lastly is symbolic interactions. This is someone’s internal response to someone else’s actions. It is highly dependent on the people involved. If a roommate does my dishes or laundry I think they are being sweet. But when my sister or family does it I feel like they think I am lazy. Especially when my brother’s do it. Considering that I normally do those things for them.
So in conclusion families are very complex and diverse. And that is okay. No two family’s are going to be alike. I would love and appreciate your opinions on these matters. Have you noticed any if these things in your own families, or outside of your own families? Does this seem plausible to you? If you have any questions please make a comment below and I would love to talk to you about it. Anyway I hope you guys liked this post and where able to learn something along with me.
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Learning and growing knowledge about families. 